I jump then I die then I smile

sometimes people disappoint you
and the hard part is that you can't tell them what they did (or didn't do) so they can make you feel better
cause the fact that you have to explain what made you sad in the first place would be another reason to be disappointed...
then you'd end up feeling worse. (Krissy.2008)

If somebody's suddenly irritated and sad, there must be a reason. Your gf/bf is not psycho. He/she does not pick a fight just because he/she wants to. There is a reason. Find that out. And then if you do, prepare an open mind. Don't go "that's it?", go "I understand now." Relationship is not a game you play - whoever apologizes more loses. If he/she gets irritated and sad because of a petty thing (petty being relative, of course), apologize anyway. And then explain. Don't jump the gun and explain at once. That's not going to work. Say, "I'm sorry this made you feel sad. I hope you feel better. I understand you but I want you to understand as well that I didn't mean it. It just came out wrong. What I meant was..." Now isn't that better than, "You're antagonizing all that I'm saying!" or "I don't understand why you're so irritated!" or "Don't push me!"

Why do I feel like I'm teaching the ABCs to a 30-year-old?