2 Libras

I don't know what it is. Call it stupidity, martyrdom...selflessness if you will, but if you decide to pose me the undearable question that is "why", I would probably give you the most ironic answer I can, "I don't know". And for someone who always knows, believe me, it takes a lot of ounces of self-doubt to admit to not knowing.

It's just a couple of days before he submits to his feelings and tell me the things I've been wanting him to tell me. I know; that's what he told me. You might think that I am in a perfect situation. I am finally getting what is due for me for more than a month now. But really, you're mistaken.

For some time I have waited for him to come to you. I dreaded the thought but did not dismiss the possibility. For what do I stand against a 2-year relationship? I am a mere stranger. I cannot bear to be the stimulus that inhibits what is fate. And so I have given him time, enough space so he can still run back to you if his heart tells him too, and enough belongingness so he'll still have someone to laugh with while he trudges the way to moving on. What do I stand to gain, you might ask? I wish I knew.

I don't want him to be half-hearted if/when he decides to be with me. I want him whole - the same thing he wants of me. I want to be the only one. Isn't that what you want too?

Please run after him now. If you still love him and you still want him back, take the risk. If he loves you still then he might just come back. And you will continue on with your love the way fate has designed. My heart will be broken, shattered in numerous pieces, but I'd take it.I'd take it because I know I deserve him whole. And if he cannot commit this, then the alternative will just be equally heartbreaking, if not more. If he decides to stay with me, then we still both win. You will never have the what-ifs in your head. You could say that you did give it your all. In the end, that's the only that will matter.

Do you still love him? Do you believe that you can take care of him more than I can? Do you feel that he can only be happy with you? Do you think that it would be best for him to come back?Will you love him if he does?

If you answered yes to all of these, then here's your chance. Take it. Give us both the favor of being with the person who loves us and not being with the one who doesn't.
I am giving you this chance because I love him. And I want him happy...no matter what that means.


P.S. I should hate you for the things you say wrongly of me. For now, I don't. Don't make it otherwise.

Please Lang

Utang na loob...


Wag niyo akong sasaktan...sa akin humuhugot ng lakas ang pamilya ko.

Kung sasaktan niyo ako...nanakawan niyo ng lakas ang mga kapatid at nanay ko.

Kaya wag...wag niyo akong sasaktan.


Utang na loob...


HINDI KO KAYO INAANO!


*mananahimik ako hanggang kaya ko, pero kung hindi ka titigil, lalaban ako. dahil sa bawat sakit na binibigay mo sakin, nasasaktan din ang pamilya ko. at hindi ko aatrasan ang sino mang manakit sa kanila.

rebound

I'm stuck.

I don't wanna go anywhere. I just want to stay here...with him. But I don't want to stand in between what could be fate. I may be the only thing that's keeping you two apart. I may be the unnatural distraction that inhibits his longing for you. I may be the unwanted addition in this math.

I just want to stay here with him. But as I discover your plea for his approval yet again, my soul remains restless. I feel your pain. And even if I don't know you, I don't want you to get hurt. I am the only one standing in the way. I cannot fathom happiness with him if that will mean your loneliness.

You love him. And yes, I know he loves you. My role in this circumstance poses the most ambiguity. I'd like to think he needs me. But until when? Until he finds you again? I'd like to think you don't need him. But until when? Until you realize you do? When's that? When i realize I need him too?

Why did you have to let him go? Why did you have to let him meet me?

I'm stuck...between two people who are passionately in love with each other...separated by personal differences, blinded by the vicariousness of the world.

I'm stuck...because I allow myself to be. I don't want to leave. I just want to be here with him. I'm sorry. I cannot give him up for you just yet. I know he is yours. and he will be..again. But you see, he makes me happy now. He makes me laugh. he makes my sadness go away. I need him more than you do right now.

I'm stuck and I'm sorry.